Of Love and Lies
by TheMultiFandomFangirl
Summary: Sequel to 'You Never Know' and 'Matters of the Heart'. Lily, Fred...and Mason. Mason wants her back, but Lily loves Fred. What lengths will Mason go to, to get her back? Fred/OC. Rated for violence, nothing too explicit but just to be safe.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

"Are you sure you're gonna be okay?" Fred asked Lily as he walked her to the Slytherin common room.

"Fred, I'll be fine. Don't worry about me." she said with a warm smile.

"Sweetie, I _do_ worry about, as your boyfriend, it's kinda my job." he said.

"I know," she said standing on her toes to reach his lips, "I love it."

"I love _you_."

"Yeah, you're not bad." she taunted. They stopped outside the Slytherin common room. Lily took a deep breath and Fred gave her hand a squeeze.

"Lily, if you wanna spend the night in my dorm, you know that's okay. We don't mind." he said, once more trying to convince her not to go step into the common room.

"Fred, I've been there the last three nights, I can't keep hiding." she said looking towards the portrait.

"Okay love." he leaned down and kissed her forehead, knowing that he would miss her warmth tonight.

They had only been back to Hogwarts for one week and it hadn't been easy. It seemed like there were only about ten people supporting their relationship.

All conversation turned to soft whispers as Lily stepped into the common room. They were talking about her again. They weren't even trying to be discreet about it anymore. She ignored them and went straight to her dorm.

"Hey." Cassidy said to her.

"Hi Cass." she replied.

"Is it getting to you?" Cassidy asked.

"What?" Lily asked, sitting on her bed.

"The whispers, the glares, what people are saying about you?" she said.

"Oh, well, no. Not really, I mean, it pisses me off sometimes, but then I remember that I have Fred, and then I just don't give a shit." she shrugged.

"But...Fred is the reason people are saying these things." said Cass.

"I know, but I chose him." Lily said sincerely.

* * *

Fred walked back to the Gryffindor common room slowly. He wanted to take his time getting there, because he knew what awaited him when he did. They'd only been back for a week, and Fred had been called possibly every offensive word in the English language, even by his own house. He didn't care though, he would do anything to be able to call Lily his.

He stumbled into the common room and was greeted by "Oh, hi there traitor." by Seamus Finnegan. Fred rolled his eyes and walked to George.

"Don't worry about them mate; they're just jealous." he reassured his twin.

Fred didn't have time to reply, because he heard a seventh Gryffindor boy say "Jealous of what? Your pathetic _Slytherin _girlfriend? Please, even her family doesn't want her, why would anyone else?" he said followed by laughs and a few quiet applauds from the rest of the room. Fred gripped his wand in his pocket.

"Take that back you prat." Fred said through clenched teeth.

"Why should I?" he retorted "she's a good for nothing, waste of space!"

Fred stormed up to him and pushed him against the wall. The smirk on the boy's face disappeared when Fred pulled out his wand and held it to his throat.

"Take it back." he growled slowly. The bronze haired and the red haired boys said nothing to each other for a few seconds.

"Alright, fine! I'm sorry." said the older boy. Fred pulled his wand away and went to his dorm.

"Fred, are you okay?" he heard George's voice behind him.

"I don't really wanna talk about it Georgie." Fred said and pulled the covers over his head and drifted slowly to sleep.

The next morning, Fred walked to the dungeons to wait for Lily in front of her common room. When he saw Lily step out of the portrait, his heart skipped a beat, as it did every time he saw her. He took her hand and walked happily to the breakfast banquet.

"You ready?" Fred asked her, stopping just outside the entrance to the great hall.

"Yeah, I'm ready." she nodded. Fred was still worried, but he dismissed it and placed a lingering kiss on his girlfriend's cheek. They let their hands go and walked in. They looked across at each other as they went their separate ways to the house tables.

"Why are you here?" Brady Hankins asked her bitterly.

"Excuse me? I'm _still_ a Slytherin." she said.

"A pretty poor excuse for one." he said.

"Oh, leave her alone Hankins." Said a deep voice. Lily turned to see Mason taking place at the table next to her.

"Mason," she said, "hi."

"Hey Lil." he said with a lopsided smile. Lily didn't say anything; she just put some toast on her plate and looked up at Fred. He didn't look back though, he had a death glare fixed on Mason.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

"Fred, you can't still be mad." Lily said as they walked to their divination lesson.

"I not mad." he said flatly, not even looking at her.

"Yes you are! I'm not an idiot." she pleaded.

"I know you aren't an idiot. Okay, I'm a little annoyed-" he said.

"You're pissed Fred." Lily cut in.

"I just don't trust Mason, that's all." he said, "I know he still wants you."

"Do you trust _me_?" she asked.

"Lily you know I do." he said.

"Then you know, that no matter how much Mason wants me, he's never, ever gonna have me. I'm happily taken." she said and beamed up at the tall red head.

"I just want him to back off," Fred said, "I don't want to fight to keep you, but I will if I have to."

"That's what I'm saying Fred, there's no competition." she said sliding her arms around his waist as they walked.

When they got to the classroom, they saw George and Lee sitting in a corner and went to join them. Fred sat on a light pink armchair and Lily sat across on his lap. Mason stepped into the class not long after. His eyes lingered on Lily longingly.

Professor Trelawney walked absent-minded into the room, silently demanding the students' attention. All eyes turned to the professor. She instructed them to continue their work with the crystal balls from last week. No one really took this class seriously; it was just easy to pass.

"Excuse me young lady." Trelawney said in her airy voice.

"Who? Me?" Lily asked. Trelawney nodded.

"I would advise you to get your own seat." she finished. Lily dragged her body off of Fred's lap an onto the chair beside him. Lily thought at the time that Trelawney just didn't like Lily sitting on Fred, but ten minutes later, a cup fell from the shelf above Fred and if Lily was still there it would've smashed on her head. Then again, maybe it was just a coincidence.

The lesson went quite slowly and Mason kept looking over at Lily and Fred flirting with each other. Mason was jealous. He wanted Lily and he planned on getting her.

Everyone was leaving and it was the last class of the day. Lily felt the professor's spidery fingers curl around her shoulder.

"My dear girl," she said in a sympathetic tone, "I'm so sorry."

"S-sorry? Sorry for what?" Lily asked.

"You'll understand tomorrow." she said and turned away.

Lily shook it off and left the room. Trelawney was a crock anyway.

"What was that about?" Fred asked.

"Guess I'll find out tomorrow." she joked, "I promised I'd help Pansy with her transfiguration homework, so I've gotta go."

"Okay love." he said and met her lips in a soft kiss. People around them muttered angrily and kept walking.

"Bye." she whispered before turning on her heel and walking in the direction of the Slytherin common room. Fred stared after her with a smile playing on his lips.

"Oi! Fred." he heard behind him. The corridor was nearly empty, and even if it wasn't, Fred would know the voice.

"What do you want _Mason_?" Fred spat, turning to face him.

"Oh, I think you already know." Mason smirked.

"Sod off! You'll never have her." Fred growled.

"Yes, I will." Mason said calmly.

"Oh really? How do you plan to do that?" Fred asked rhetorically.

"Easy, you're going to dump her, therefore, breaking her heart and if I know Lily, and I do, she will want you to hurt, and that's where I come in." Mason said.

"What the fuck makes you think I'm going to break up with her?" Fred shouted, seconds away from pulling out his wand.

"Well you see; your father's department at the Ministry is close to being shut down. My father has a large amount of input on that decision. Now, if your father loses his job, your whole family will lose _everything_. And you barely have anything to lose. So if you want your father to keep his job, you will let Lily go." Mason said and left Fred standing in an empty corridor, feeling empty himself.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

Fred stumbled into his dorm and onto his bed. He stared silently at the roof, running through what had just happened.

"Fred?" George asked. "You alright mate?"

Fred stayed silent and just shook his head.

"What's the matter?" George asked.

"I have to leave Lily." he choked wiping away a tear that was starting to roll down his cheek.

"What! Why?"

"Mason is threatening to have his dad fire ours if I don't break up with her."

"He can't do that can he?"

"Apparently, he can."

"Fred, I, I really wish I could say something to make you feel better." George said.

"Can you convince me to change my mind?" Fred asked hopefully.

"I can't mate. If dad loses his job, it'll tear our family apart." George said sadly.

"I know, but I don't know what I'm going to do without her." Fred said turning away from George.

"I'm sorry." George said and closed the hangings around Fred's bed.

Fred muttered a silencing charm and cried himself to sleep.

* * *

When Lily walked out of the common room the next morning, Fred wasn't there.

_'Maybe he just slept in._' Lily thought to herself.

She walked to the Gryffindor common room, ignoring the nasty comments. She uttered the portrait password and stepped inside and headed for the boys dorms. Dean tried to stop her but she pushed past him. She saw Fred lying asleep on his bed.

She crawled onto the end of his bed. His hands found hers, showing her he wasn't asleep. He pulled her to him and wrapped his arms tightly around her. She giggled girlishly as he kissed the side of her neck.

"Wanna go for a walk?" Fred mumbled into her neck.

"Okay." she replied happily, wiggling out of his grasp. She jumped off of his bed and dragged him out. She waited in the Gryffindor common room while he got dressed.

Fred wanted more than anything to not have to go through with this. He knew he had to though. If he didn't...he didn't even want to think of what would happen to his family. He thought he hated Mason before, he was wrong. He _despised _him now. He wanted nothing to do with Mason; which brought him right back to breaking up with Lily. If he wanted Mason out of his life, Lily had to leave it too, and that was the very last thing he wanted. He had to stop torturing himself by thinking about this. He was doing the right thing.

Wasn't he?

Should he tell Lily about what Mason is threatening to do? She'd understand. He knew she would, but of course, she wouldn't go running to Mason and Arthur would lose his job anyway.

_Running to Mason_. The thought made Fred sick to his stomach.

His heart raced as he trod down the stairs to meet Lily in the Gryffindor common room. She was waiting alone in a corner. He hated seeing her like that; alone.

"Hey." he said, his voice shaking.

"Hey." she said cheerily. She took his hand and they walked towards the lake side-by-side. There were a few hisses and mean remarks from onlookers, but Fred and his beauty happily dismissed them.

He sat by the clear blue lake with Lily leaning against him. The breeze was light and the sun was about to rise. It was the perfect makings of a romantic morning. This, Fred knew, was going to be anything but romantic.

"Fred," Lily said with a nudge, "penny for your thoughts?"

"Look, Lily." he sounded like he'd just swallowed sandpaper.

"Yeah?" Lily asked nervously.

"I've been thinking, and this week has been...pretty full on." he managed.

"I know, but, we can get through it, we always do." she said, about to kiss him but he turned his head.

"I, I don't think we _can_ get through it this time." his voice was getting thicker. His false confidence was the only thing stopping the tears he was holding in.

"What are you saying?" Lily's voice broke.

"I'm saying, I will _always_ love you, but we just...shouldn't be together." he looked away from the tears sparkling in her eyes.

"Did I do something wrong? Please, Fred! Please! I love you Freddie! I'll do anything! Don't do this to us!" she begged through gasps of breath. She felt like someone just kicked her in the gut.

"I'm sorry, Lil. I just can't, it's too hard." he said standing up and beginning to walk back to the castle. Lily jumped up after him.

"I thought we were worth it, _you said_ we were worth it! Why are you changing your mind on us now?" she screamed between sobs.

Fred ignored her and kept walking. Lily's knees buckled and she fell to the ground crying.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

Lily's head was spinning. Maybe it was just a dream, maybe she was still asleep. She hoped she was still asleep and this was just a nightmare. A horribly vivid nightmare. She wanted that to be what it was. She knew it wasn't though. She knew that all the light had just left her world.

She sat beneath the tree by the lake, where they used to meet at night. Where they used to whisper 'I love you'. Where they used to talk about their pasts, thinking their futures were with each other.

Lily left as the tears fell harder. This place, this tree by this lake, held too many memories of Fred. She walked past the castle. She had no intention of going to class, she was a mess.

She came around to the back of the castle and stopped dead in her tracks. This place held even more memories than the lake. This is where they had their first fight, when Fred asked her to the Yule Ball. She ran into the castle, sobbing loudly, having no cares for anyone she disturbed. She bolted to the first floor bathroom, where Moaning Myrtle lived. She ran in and magically locked the door shut. She sat on the floor in the corner, curled up into a ball, shaking and crying.

"What did I do?" she asked no one, rocking herself slightly, "what did I do?"

"What did you do to who?" a soft voice said. Lily's head shot up and she saw Myrtle sitting in front of her.

"Hi, Myrtle." Lily whispered.

"Hello Lily," Myrtle replied, "what happened to you?"

"F-Fred...he broke up with me." Lily whimpered.

"Ooh, now why did he do that?" Myrtle drawled.

"I did something wrong. That must be it. It has to be," Lily said absentminded, "if I did something wrong, then I can fix it and he'll come back to me."

* * *

Fred had tears rolling down his face in steady lines as he walked to his dorm. He couldn't believe he just did that. Lily was the best thing that he could've ever had; she was beautiful, smart, and she was his. Now she's soon to be Mason's.

He walked into the dorm bathroom and clenched his hands tightly around the edges of the sink. Fred screamed in hurt and anger and thrust his fist at the mirror, shattering it into little jagged pieces. He took deep breaths to calm down, and looked at what was left of the mirror on the wall.

"Reparo." he muttered, swishing his wand. The pieces levitated off the floor and pieced themselves back together.

He sat on his bed, crying silently for what seemed like forever. When he heard the lunch signal, he got up to find Mason. He searched the corridors near the Great Hall and found him about to go into the lunch banquet. Fred pulled him aside roughly by his robes.

"It's done, Mason." Fred said, under his breath. Mason's face broke into a smile he wasn't even trying to hide.

"Brilliant." he said happily.

"Mason, I _swear_, if you hurt her, I will kill you." Fred threatened, but Mason's smile remained.

"Fred, I don't believe it's possible to hurt her more than you just did." Mason patted him on the back in a congratulatory way and walked into the hall.

Fred stepped into the hall and looked around. He didn't see Lily and became immediately worried. He was about to go look for her, to see if she was okay, when he remembered, he didn't really have that right anymore.

He sat next to George, and neither of them spoke to each other. George knew better than to try. Fred looked across at the spot where she usually sat. He imagined her smiling at him across the tables, picking at her pancakes and toast, giving him playful smiles in return for flirty winks. It'd barely been half a day and he was already struggling without her.

He wondered if she'd turned up to class, or ditched, like he did. He wanted to know how she was feeling. He wanted to know what she was doing, where she was, what was on her mind. He wanted to know what she usually told him, and he felt uneasy knowing he might never hear her tell him any of that again.

He wanted to run and find her, he wanted to explain everything, but he knew he couldn't. He wanted to wrap his arms around her and assure her that it was all going to be fine, even though he knew it wasn't. He hadn't only lost the first and only girl he'd ever loved, he had lost more than that; his confidant, his partner in crime, his best friend.

Sure, he still had George, but it wasn't the same. Lily was his world. He would have done anything she asked him to do, and he still would.

* * *

Lily walked to one of the mirrors and wiped her face. Her eyes were red and puffy from crying, and her hair was a mess. She took a deep breath and stared at her reflection.

"Don't be pathetic," she said to herself, "there's obviously a reason he broke up with me. I can fix it, I can make it better. Tomorrow me and Fred will be laughing, and kissing, and walking hand-in-hand again, and we will have completely forgotten about this. He loves me. He does."

She took one last deep breath and walked towards the great hall. She got there in the middle of the dinner banquet, and when she stepped in, all eyes turned to her. She caught Fred's gaze for a brief second, and she could swear she saw happiness and relief wash over him, before she looked away in hurt. She hurried over to the Slytherin table, and there were only two seats left. Next to Draco, where she usually sat, in Fred's direct eye-line, where they used to exchange flirty looks with one another from across the tables. The other, was next to Mason and she wasn't particularly fond of him, but it was better than having to face Fred at that moment. So she took her seat beside Mason, whose face lit up in surprise and delight at the sight of her.

"Lily, hi." he said happily, Lily attempted to smile in reply, "I, uh, I heard about you and Fred." he added faking sympathy.

"Wow, news really does travel fast." she said, taking a few waffles.

"Only good news." he said flashing what would usually be considered a charming smile.

"I'm not exactly seeing the bright side of the situation." she said sadly.

"Well, you're free now, and I was thinking, maybe we could have another go." he said hopefully.

"Fred still loves me, he told me so. I just need to find a way to fix whatever is wrong." she looked up at Mason and shrugged, "as long as he still loves me, I'm his."


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

"Fred!" Mason called to him after dinner.

"What?" Fred snapped.

"Lily thinks you still love her." Mason said.

"I _do_ still love her." Fred said bitterly.

"Well stop!" Mason said.

"Stop? I can't just stop loving her!" Fred said.

"She's not giving up on you until you're over her." Mason told him.

"I'll never be over her." Fred said, looking at the floor.

"Whatever, just tell her you don't love her." Mason instructed.

"So it's not enough that I've broken her heart, now you want me to rip it out?" Fred asked rhetorically. The two boys stared at each other hatefully for a while before Mason finally replied.

"Stomp on it if you have to."

* * *

Lily was in her dorm now, pondering what could've gone wrong. She was determined to make it right and get back her love. She was so lost in her thoughts that she didn't even notice the girl standing in the doorway.

"Lily?" she said, wondering if Lily could even hear her.

"Huh? Oh, Tina, hi." Lily said half-heartedly.

"How are you?" Tina asked, stepping closer to Lily.

"I'm, I'm...I'm really not okay." Lily said letting the tears fall again. Tina brought Lily into a friendly hug, trying to console her.

"I can't believe you and Fred broke up," Tina said, "I thought you guys were perfect for each other."

"Yeah, so did I." Lily said quietly.

"What I don't get is why. Okay, yeah, your relationship was getting a lot of hate, I understand that could've created some conflict, but from what I've seen, you and Fred could've gotten past it. At least, that's what it seemed like." Tina said.

"I thought the same thing. I honestly thought that after I'd gotten disowned for being with him, and being shunned by my own house, that we could survive anything. Obviously I was wrong. I guess he didn't realize what he signed on for when he said 'I love you'." Lily said avoiding Tina's eyes.

"Have you talked to him since..." Tina trailed off. Lily shook her head.

"I just cried. All day. I was going to talk to him after dinner, but I looked at him and chickened out. So I just came here." Lily admitted.

"Do you want my advice?" Tina asked.

"Yes please." Lily whispered.

"Talk to him. If you don't, you'll never have closure." Tina said patting Lily on the shoulder as she left the room. Lily thought for a second before gathering up the courage to follow Tina's advice. Talk to him. How hard could it be?

Lily walked quickly out of the dungeons and towards the Gryffindor common room. What if Fred was asleep? What if he didn't want to talk to her? She was so busy looking at the floor and muttering to herself that she wasn't paying attention to where she was walking, and that is when she ran into Fred. Quite literally.

The two collided and their senses took over. The smell of him made Lily's tummy fill with butterflies. The sight of her bright green eyes against her dark, thick, eyelashes made Fred's knees go weak. She was still the most beautiful girl he'd ever seen. Even with her messy hair, red puffy eyes and makeup smeared all over her face from crying. She was all he wanted. When he saw her, his first instinct was to tell her she looked beautiful, and then tell her he loved her, and then kiss her, and it took all of his will power to ignore these instincts.

Her instincts weren't much different. She wanted to run her hands through his shiny red hair, and then tell him she loved him, and then kiss him. And she nearly didn't ignore these instincts when she reached up her hand, but pulled away at the last second.

"Lily, I was just looking for you." he managed to say.

"Me too," she said with a shaky voice, "look Fred, I have no idea what I did wrong. I need to know so I can make it better. Please tell me what I did." she pleaded.

"You didn't do anything Lil," his expression was so loving and sad at the same time, until a cold one washed over it, "it's just, I don't feel the same way I did."

"What?" she said on the verge of yet another breakdown, "What changed?"

"I don't know. I can't explain it Lily, I just _don't_." he said.

"Say it." Lily demanded.

"What?" he asked in disbelief.

"Say you don't love me." she said.

Fred didn't say anything. He felt like he was about to throw up. He was standing before the girl he loved, and he had to say he didn't love her. It was hard enough for him just to say 'I don't' let alone finish the whole sentence. He knew he had to though, for his family. So he put on a brave face, and acted like he had no emotions, like nothing could hurt him. He mustered up all the strength he had and finally spoke.

"Fine, I don't love you." he said leaving Lily standing alone in the corridor.


	6. Chapter 6

**WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! This chapter contains self-harm!**

* * *

**Chapter 6**

Lily's father taught her three things when she was growing up. One; never get attached, because the ones we love are the ones that always hurt us most. Two; when someone hurts us, make them hurt the way they hurt you. Three; when you are in pain, make it hurt more until you become immune.

Lily ran to Myrtle's bathroom and locked herself inside. She was still crying as she cast a silencing spell around the room so no one would hear her screams. She shut herself in one of the stalls and pulled out her wand. Her heart leapt with fear as she held her wand to her forearm.

Her mind flashed back to Fred as she said "Sectumsempra."

She shrieked in agony as she saw the blood dripping off of her arm. She sobbed as the pain shot through her. She said it again, creating another wound on her arm. She screamed again, but louder this time. She winced, and sobbed, and screamed more and more each time she shouted the curse. The floor of the stall was crimson red with her blood. Each scar that would be left on her arm, was going to remind her not to trust people. It would remind he breaking her of Mason breaking her heart, back when it was unscathed. It would remind her of her mother and father's betrayal. Most importantly, it would remind her of the way Fred ruined her, and made her wish she would just die. After hours of self-harm, the pain began to lessen. It didn't seem to hurt as much, and Lily's emotions started to fade away. _Make it hurt more until you become immune_. That's exactly what she was doing.

* * *

Fred walked away from Lily, although he nearly turned back. She gave up her family for him, why couldn't he do the same for her? He knew why, because he had a lot more to lose. Didn't he?

He looked back at the girl who had his heart - whether she knew it or not - who was now running in the other direction. He could still her her sobs, and they were echoing through his head. He still couldn't believe that he had caused this.

Fred walked quickly to their tree by the lake. He still called it 'their tree', even though there was no 'them' anymore. No, Fred couldn't think like that. It hurt too much. No matter what Mason did, no matter what Mason said, Lily belonged to Fred. She loved him, and he loved her, she just couldn't know.

He sat beneath the shade of the large tree. He reminisced about all the times he sat in that very spot with Lily. Their play fights, their flirtatious banter, their heated snogs, their stolen kisses and forbidden 'I love you'. He wanted more than anything to have that back, even just more more minute to have her in his arms.

There were no words to explain his hatred for Mason Williamson. He wished he could just Avada Kedavra him, even a Crucio would suffice. Though, of course, the consequences of that would be far worse. And doing that, wouldn't get Lily back, it might even push her further away and there was enough distance between them already.

"Hey mate." a voice identical to his came from behind.

"Oh, hi Georgie." Fred said wiping away tears from his face. It was no use though, they just kept coming.

"Why are you torturing yourself by sitting here Freddie? This is yours and Lily's spot." George said.

"Because, I, I feel close to her here." Fred said.

"I wish there was something I could do to make you feel better." George said taking place beside his twin.

"You could kill Mason, that would help." Fred joked...sort of.

"Look, I know you're upset, but you and Lily will find a way." George consoled.

"Do you know what I had to do tonight?" Fred asked George. George shook his head, "I had to tell her that I didn't love her." Fred's voice cracked as the tears ran harder, "I had to look her in the eye and tell her that I just, don't love her anymore."

"Fred, I-" George seemed lost for words.

"I had to watch her heart break, all over again and act like I didn't give a damn! She thinks I don't care about her." Fred said staring aimlessly into the lake. George didn't say anything, he knew there was nothing he could do to help. So the twins just sat there, staring at the lake.

* * *

As the days passed, Lily barely noticed the pain in her arm. She went back to the bathroom everyday to 'become immune'. Parts of the floor were stained red from all of her blood that had spilled there. It was a Friday when it finally started noticeably working.

She dropped the sleeve of her robe back down to cover her wounds and walked confidently back to the Slytherin common room. She had pushed all her emotions away. She was trying her best to not care, and after torturing herself for nearing a week, it was nearly working. She wanted to hurt Fred, like he hurt her. He can't just wake up one day and decide he doesn't love her. She was going to make him want her and she knew just how to do it.

Before going to breakfast the next morning, she looked through her _Advanced Potions _book and searched for a quick healing spell. In the meantime, she bandaged her arm the muggle way - something she learnt from Mr Weasley - and made sure that her left forearm stayed hidden. She walked gracefully into the great hall for the breakfast feast, and immediately caught Fred's eye. She smirked to herself and sat beside Mason, who stopped his conversation with Brady Hankins when she sat down.

"Hi, Mason." she said gleefully taking an apple off of silver tray in front of her.

"Hey, Lily, how are you feeling?" he had a false look of concern plastered on his face.

"Oh please, will you stop with the fake sympathy. I know you're loving every second of it." she said, observing her shiny red apple.

"Well, I'm not loving that you're upset, but I do love the fact that you're single now." he flashed her a flirty smile, which she returned, "so, there's a Hogsmeade trip tomorrow, you going?"

"Yeah, I was thinking about it." she smiled charmingly.

"I know its late notice, but would you maybe wanna go with me?" he asked with pride edging on his voice.

"Pick me up at eight-thirty, in the entrance hall and _don't_ be late." she said before taking a bite of her apple and skipping out of the hall.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

By lunch time, Mason had boasted to everyone that he had a date with Lily. She had spent lunch with her newfound friend Tina Raven as they had their next class, Transfiguration, together. Tina obviously knew about Lily's 'date' with Mason, but she didn't approve; she was still team Fred.

"Lily, you shouldn't do this." Tina warned as they walked to the Transfiguration classroom.

"Do what?" Lily asked innocently.

"You _know_ what." she said pointedly but Lily acted as though she hadn't heard, "you can't date Mason."

"Why the fuck not?" she snapped, "it's not like there's anything stopping me."

"If this is about Fred, then, it's stupid!" Tina said.

"Fred doesn't love me!" Lily shouted, causing the corridor to fall silent.

"Oh come on! We both know that's not true." Tina argued.

"He said so himself Tina," Lily said nearing calmness, "he looked me in the eye and said 'I don't love you' and then he walked away. So tell me now why I can't go out with Mason. He's been _nice_ to this past week."

"Lil, not everyone that smiles at you is your friend." Tina said.

"I know that, but right now, you aren't exactly acting like a friend either." Lily finished and walked into the classroom.

* * *

All Fred heard about that Friday was Lily and Mason's impending date. It was either 'have you heard that Lily is going to Hogsmeade with Mason?' or 'I'm sorry about Lily and Mason.' or 'Finally she's with someone of her standards.' but the worst yet, was 'At least she's happy.' Fred wanted Lily to be happy, but he wanted her to be happy with anyone _but_ Mason. Actually, no, he only wanted her to be happy with him. He knew it was selfish for him to want that, but it's not like he gave her up willingly. He wanted her so much more than before. He felt a pang in his stomach at the thought that she could be happy with anyone but him.

"Uh, Fred?" Seamus asked wearily.

"What do you want?" Fred replied unhappily.

"I just wanted to say, I'm sorry. I know I didn't support your relationship with Lily. I've been known to judge things too harshly before really giving them a chance, but I realize now, that I liked you both a lot better when you were together. I really am sorry." he finished with a nod and left to go to class.

Fred was overwhelmed by what just happened that he didn't even realize that he had his next class with Mason.

Fred sat at the desk next to Lee at the back of the classroom. He plonked his books onto the table and buried his face in his hands. He just wanted this lesson to be over. Mason walked in and sat in front of Fred. He leaned back to face Fred in a cocky way.

"I suppose you see my plan has worked, Weasley. I honestly couldn't have done it without you, thanks." he whispered, then smiled, as if he'd just won the house cup, and squashed his enemy in the process.

Fred felt anger bubbling in the pit of his stomach. It rapidly spread throughout the rest of his body. He was about to hex Mason, when Professor Flitwick walked in and addressed the class.

* * *

Lily and Tina were walking in the quad after their last class of the day. Lily needed to clear her head, and Tina was worried about what she might do if she was left alone.

"Look, Lil, I know you're upset, and I don't want it to seem like I'm trying to tell you how to live your life, but I really want you to consider _why_ you're going to Hogsmeade with Mason tomorrow." Tina said in a careful tone.

"I know why I'm doing it." Lily said with a sigh.

"Trust me, I get that you're hurting, but..."

"Hurting doesn't even begin to explain how I feel. I was disowned by my family because I wanted to be with him. I have no family and barely any friends because I'm in love - _was_ in love with him. He couldn't even take a few nasty comments." Lily said sitting one of the stone benches.

"So, you're doing this to get back at him?" Tina deduced.

"Not completely," Lily said, "I mean; part of me wants him back – a big part of me. Another part of me is saying 'I gave up everything I had, because Fred was all I needed, then he dumped me and I was left with nothing and I want my everything back,' Does that make any sense?" Lily asked.

"It does, but that still doesn't really explain, why Mason." Tina said.

"Well, the part of me I'm listening to is the coldest part," Lily said, "the part that wants him to feel pain, and regret leaving me. It's the part that wants revenge. I don't just want him to be sad, I want him to _hurt_."


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

"You comin Freddie?" George asked his brother.

"To watch Mason with Lily? No bloody way." was Fred's reply.

"It might not be that bad." George said.

"You know, Mason doesn't even love her." Fred's tone of voice told George that he was pissed.

"I know," George said, "c'mon. Come to Hogsmeade with me, we can drink your troubles away." George said giving Fred a pat on the back.

* * *

Lily waited at the entrance hall for Mason. It was 8:23, and he was nowhere to be seen. Yes, she knew she said 8:30, but he should've been early. Fred was always early for their dates; he said he wanted to spend as much time with her as possible, so he would always show up early.

'_Stop thinking about him!_' she thought to herself. She pulled anxiously at the hem of her purple sweater, awaiting Mason's arrival.

She was growing impatient when it reached 8:32. She was beginning to think he was blowing her off. She breathed a sigh of relief when he rounded the corner and held out his arm.

"Shall we go?" he asked formally. Lily took his arm and they headed for Hogsmeade.

They walked around for a while, neither of them really spoke. Lily was telling herself that she was over Fred, and she didn't care about him. Mason was telling himself that Lily still had feelings for him.

"Do you want to go to The Three Broomsticks?" Mason offered after many minutes of awkward silence.

"Uh, sure." Lily said plastering on a smile. They walked to The Three Broomsticks. She felt Mason slip his hand in hers, and she took it. They walked in and spotted Tina and Draco sitting at a table in the corner. Tina and Lily waved to each other, and Draco gestured that they join them.

"I'll go get our drinks." Mason said and placed a kiss on Lily's temple. Lily didn't get the same warm, fuzzy feeling she got when Fred kissed her, but she smiled at her date and walked to Draco and Tina.

"Hi." Lily said sitting across from the other Slytherin girl.

"Hey." she replied, a hint of pity in her voice because she knew Lily wasn't happy.

"Lily," Draco began trying to find the right words, "I'm sorry."

"For what?" Lily shrugged.

"For what our parents did," he said, "and for not being there for you when you needed me. You were right, I was your friend but I didn't act like it. If it wasn't for me, you and Fred might still be toget-"

"Forget it." Lily said before Draco could finish the sentence. Mason placed a large glass of Butterbeer in front of Lily and sat beside her, "thanks." Lily said turning to face him.

"No problem beautiful." he said and kissed her on the lips, taking everyone by surprise. Lily grinned at Mason, although her stomach was filled with butterflies, but not the good kind. For a second she thought she'd just cheated on Fred, but then she remembered.

Lily saw the look on Tina's face. It was a mix of disapproval and sympathy. She knew what she had coming when the day was over. At this moment though, she just wanted to leave.

"Let's go for a walk." Lily said grabbing Mason's hand and dragging him away from the table, forgetting their drinks. He willingly followed. They walked around the grounds once again. Mason stopped her when they reached a tree that Lily knew all too well. It was the place where she and Fred had their first kiss, where they first said the words 'I love you'.

"Lil?" Mason asked, "What's on your mind? Aren't you enjoying yourself?"

"No, no, I am." she lied convincingly.

"Good," he took a step closer to her and snaked an arm around her waist, "I really want to make this work."

Lily looked around and saw Fred and George walking towards Hogsmeade. Her head flooded with thoughts when Fred looked back at her. Emotions flooded in, so she reacted. She ran her hands through Mason's hair and she pulled him into a deep snog. His hands found their way to her hips and he gripped her tighter.

Fred looked over at the tree where he first told Lily he loved her, and saw her there with Mason. She caught his gaze and looked away quickly. She pulled Mason down into a kiss, making Fred's stomach turn. He felt like he was going to be sick.

"You know George; a Firewhiskey sounds good right about now." Fred said sadly.


	9. NOT A CHAPTER

Due to exams, I won't be able to update for a few weeks, but when I get back, I'll have a double update for you!


	10. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

"Lily, I can't believe you are doing this!" Tina said that night in their common room.

"Tina." Lily said quietly.

"I get that you wanna hurt Fred, okay, I do, but _Mason_? You know there's only one thing he wants from you, and it's not your heart."

"Tina." Lily spoke louder.

"I could see that you didn't want him to kiss you today, so did Draco. _Draco_ knew there was something wrong. We want you to be happy Lily. Mason isn't gonna make you happy. You belong with Fred!" Tina finished.

"Tina!" Lily snapped.

"What?" Tina snapped back.

"I-I think I really fucked up." Lily's voice was uneasy.

"Oh Merlin what happened?" Tina rushed to Lily's side. Lily stood up and walked into her dorm, Tina followed. Lily closed the door and sat on her bed. Tina sat at the other end and closed the curtains and cast a silencing spell.

"After Mason and I left, we went for a walk," Tina nodded for her to go on, "we stopped at the tree where Fred and I had our first kiss and told each other how we felt," the memory hurt to think about, and a tear ran down Lily's cheek, "I saw Fred and George walking, and...and..."

"Oh, no! Don't tell me you kissed Mason." Tina gasped.

"I didn't exactly kiss him so much as shove my tongue down his throat." Lily said, shame and regret teetering in her voice.

"Well, that would've definitely hurt him." Tina said.

"I know." Lily broke into tears.

"I thought that's what you wanted." Tina was slightly confused.

"It is, but, it's just made me realize that we're really over." Tina wrapped her arms around her friend while Lily sobbed into her chest.

Lily cried and cried and cried. After what seemed like hours of crying, she finally stopped. She felt like she should cry more, but she couldn't. She had no more tears to shed, not over her family, and definitely not over Fred. All her emotions had just left her.

She left the dorm to go get some fresh air. She walked around the back of Hogwarts, where she and Fred shared so many memories, hoping to feel something, but there was nothing. So she walked to their spot by the lake. She stared at the moons silver reflection ripple in the water, and sat on the grass.

"Mind if I join you?" Mason asked sitting closely beside her.

"What, are you following me?" she teased, nudging him playfully. He laughed and his hazel eyes met her green ones. He stared at her longingly, and she stared back, although her eyes were empty. They were usually so beautiful and full of life, but now they were hollow.

He cupped her face in his hands and leaned in. She didn't lean back, but he went in for the kiss anyway. He pulled away and searched her face for any sign of a reaction, but there was none because quite frankly, she just didn't care.

Taking her not-reacting as a good sign, he went in again for a deeper kiss. She felt something inside her, but she couldn't tell if it was a good feeling or not. She kissed him back, winding her arms around his neck. His hands found her hips and eased her into a laying position. Her fingers found themselves tangled in his hair.

Their snogging was heating up, but they didn't have the same fire or passion that they did when she was with Fred. Not that she cared about him. Or so she kept telling herself.

Mason was on top of her at this point. He was straddling her waist, and his hands were trailing up and down her thighs.

"Lily?" a voice said. Lily kicked Mason off of her and sat up. She hopelessly attempted to fix her hair, which had grass scattered through it, showing that she'd just been rolling around on the ground. Lily looked up and saw George standing there, his mouth open in shock, disgust and a tinge of disappointment. Fred was standing next to him, looking anywhere but at his ex-girlfriend. Lily said nothing; she just stood up and stormed off, not wanting to deal with them at that moment. She turned around and saw George chasing after her, calling her name.

"I know you're upset, but that was cruel." he said catching up with her.

"I _am _a Slytherin." she retorted.

"That was YOUR spot. I can't believe you'd do that to him!" he said.

"Why not? It's not like he cares." she spat back.

"Oh you know he does." George said.

"He doesn't love me!" she said pointedly.

"Maybe there's more to it than you think!" George reasoned.

"What more can there possibly be to 'I don't love you'?" Lily asked throwing her hands in the air. George stayed silent, but wished he could tell Lily what he knew.

"You're hurt, I get that -" he said.

"I'm sick of being hurt!" she yelled, then added softly, "I'm always hurt. Sometimes I wonder if Fred was even worth it. I always seemed to be hurting when I was with him. Do you know how many times I've thought about erasing all the memories I have of him? All they do now is cause me pain." her voice was quickly becoming a barely audible whisper. "It's just a quick spell; _Obliviate_. It's so simple. Just one word. One word can rid me of all of these horrid bloody feelings. I wouldn't remember holding his hand whenever I walk down a corridor. I wouldn't think of kissing him whenever I see that tree in Hogsmeade. I wouldn't think of him whenever Mason takes my hand. It would be so easy, so why can't I bring myself to do it?" she looked to George, as if asking for guidance.

"Because you still love him. No matter how much he hurts you, you will still love him and you don't want to forget that."

"But it hurts," her voice cracked and a tear trickled down her cheek, "the only time I'm not in pain is when I'm _with_ Mason."

"You're happy with him?" George asked.

"Well, I didn't say that," Lily said wiping her face with the back of her hand.

"There must be some other way to feel something," George said pitifully.

"There is, but trust me, that's worse," she said quietly, thinking of the scars left on her arm.


	11. Chapter 10

**WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! This chapter contains self-harm!**

* * *

**Chapter 10**

Lily and George walked back silently. Fred and Mason were still there. Lily took Mason's hand and began to lead him away. He shot an evil look at Fred and kissed the tender spot on Lily's neck. Fred's fists clenched and his ears went red with anger. Mason's hand slid slowly down Lily's back and he kissed Lily on the cheek. Within seconds, Fred had pulled Mason away and threw him to the ground.

"Stay! Away! From! Her!" Fred screamed with every punch. Lily jumped back every time Fred's fist connected with Mason's face.

"Fred! Stop it!" she shouted, but he didn't listen. Mason ruined his life and he was gonna get it.

"She's mine you pathetic bastard!" he yelled. "She will never love you like she loves me!"

Fred's foot connected with Mason's side, hitting him directly in the ribs. Mason winced as Fred's fist impacted on his jaw once again. Lily winced as she watched in horror but she didn't know what to do. She had never seen Fred so angry, he was nearly rabid. She wanted the fight to stop, but to her own surprise, it was Fred she wanted to comfort. Mason was the one on the ground, nearly bleeding and face already started to bruise, but Lily couldn't quite bring herself to care.

"Fred please!" Lily cried one last time. He heard the panic in her voice and stopped immediately. He stood up and looked at her before walking away without saying a word. She left as well, and at first, she wasn't quite sure where she was going. She followed where her feet took her, and she ended up at Myrtle's bathroom.

She hesitated for a moment before opening the door, realising this was what she needed. The physical pain she knew she would feel in her arm was nothing compared to the constant emptiness she felt without her tall, red-headed soul mate. She knew this routine all too well. She took out her wand and put up a silencing spell. She rolled up her sleeve and took off her bandage, revealing all the horrible scars.

"Sectumsempra!" she said and let out a blood-curdling scream. She repeated it again and again, her screams growing more and more dire each time. She re-bandaged her arm when she had gotten it all out of her system. The blood was draining down the sink. With a swish of her wand it had all swirled and disappeared, but the stains still remained.

She went back to the dorm – after a fair while of crying and screaming her ex-boyfriend's name - and re-counted the evening's events to Tina. She had barely finished the story before Tina rushed out of the dorm hastily, leaving Lily, once again, alone and confused.

* * *

Fred was sitting on his bed in his dorm, tugging at the roots of his red hair as if he were about to pull it out at any second.

"Fred you're going to tear your hair out if you keep pulling at it." George said, trying to abolish the tension and anger that filled the room. The others that were in the dorm left as soon as they saw the state that Fred was in when he entered.

"I shouldn't have let myself lose control." Fred muttered, more to himself than George.

"It's not like the arse didn't deserve it." George mumbled in return. Fred opened his mouth to reply, but was interrupted by a loud shout from the doorway.

"Fred!" Tina Raven stood in the doorway of the dorm, positively fuming. Her eyes flickered from one freckled twin to the other. She suddenly realised that she had no clue whatsoever which Gryffindor boy was Fred. They were both shocked by the abrupt intrusion that they both looked up in surprise. She sighed.

"Which one of you is the wanker that broke my best friend's heart?" There was no aggression in her voice, only pity.

One boy looked at the floor while the other looked at his twin. This was all the confirmation she needed. She looked to the twin on the right, who had his regret-filled eyes locked on the floor. She apologised to George for calling him a wanker. He nodded his forgiveness.

"Is that all you wanted; to insult me? Because if it is, there's nothing that I haven't already called myself." he slowly raised his head to see her concerned expression. "And by the way, who exactly are you?"

"I'm Tina. Look we really need to talk. Lily –"

"Lily?" Fred's eyes widened "Is she okay? Is she hurt?"

"No, she's not okay at all. And yes, she is hurt. Both physically and emotionally."

Fred jumped off the bed and made for the door. Tina pressed her palm against his chest forcefully, making Fred stumble backwards.

"What are you doing?" he asked Tina, panic-stricken.

"You can't see her right now."

"If she's hurt I have to help!" Fred's breathing was rapid.

"You won't help her by going to see her." she reasoned.

"Why the fuck not?" he all but shouted in the girls face.

"Because she's doing it to herself!" Tina shouted back.

The room fell silent, apart from their breaths. Fred's eyes widened even more in horror. George's jaw basically hit the floor and there was a look of disbelief on his face.

"W-what?" Fred whispered, his voice seemed to have vanished.

"She's been…harming herself with the _Sectumsempra_ curse."

"No!" Fred croaked. "She wouldn't! She wouldn't do that to herself! She's a smart girl! Why would she?"

Something inside Tina snapped.

"Why? _Why_? You! That's why! She seems to believe that you don't fucking care about her! She thinks that _you_ don't care! You fucked up Fred! You ruined her! She doesn't want to go on without you - and I'm not joking – she wants it all to END! She wants peace; she wants relief from her pain, Fred she wants to die! It's so horrendously obvious that you love her and it's just confusing her more! She doesn't understand why you beat up mason like you did and quite frankly, I don't either. It makes no sense. If you love her – which you do – why did you break up with her? Why did you tell her you don't love her? Was it all a just some game to you? A stupid, thoughtless prank?"

"NO! How can you even think that?"

"Then why?"

"Because I didn't have a fucking choice!"

They stared at each other for a moment. They were both on the verge of tears for the same person.

"What do you mean?" Tina asked calmly.

"I mean, that if I had a choice, I would be holding Lily's hand, telling her how much I love her and about to snog her senseless. I wouldn't be standing here, with you screaming at me for making her suicidal." Fred choked on the last word. His chest was heaving and his eyes were burning from the tears he was trying to contain.

"So why aren't you?" Tina asked.

"Mason threatened to have our dad fired if Fred didn't break up with Lily and convince her that he didn't love her." George explained since Fred was once again unable to speak.

"So he basically asked you to rip Lily's heart out?" Tina said sarcastically.

"His exact words were 'stomp on it if you have to'." Fred said.

"He blackmailed you?" she asked in disbelief. Fred nodded sadly.

"Do you really think that, after everything, I would give her up willingly?" Fred stated.

"No, I guess not." Tina said softly.

"Tina, I love her so much it hurts, but there's nothing I can do." Fred admitted in defeat.

Tina nodded grimly, but there was a look in her eye that said she was trying to devise a plan.


	12. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

Lily sat on her dorm bed, completely befuddled. Tina had just run out on her after Lily told her she had just cut once again. The blood on her arm had dried, but it still stung a little.

This was all Fred's fault. He made her this way. He made her depressed, empty and crazy.

She needed to talk to him. She needed to tell him everything she had been holding inside, but first, she needed alcohol.

She walked to the kitchen with her head down. The halls were unusually empty for a Saturday night after a Hogsmeade trip. They were normally scattered with students that were still in date-mode, even though their dates were long over. Lily was quite grateful for the lack of strays though. She didn't feel as if she could face the happy couples that graced these corridors on most Saturday nights.

She tickled the picture of the fruit, as she had seen filch do the night of her first detention of sixth year. She stepped into the kitchen and looked around; even the white walls, pearly marble floor and silver bench tops held memories of her past love. She remembered her 'ajax' fight with Fred and George and it pained her to think of a time when she was still so close to the twins.

It seemed so far back now. Nearly a year had passed since then. At the start of this year, she was still best friends with Fred and George Weasley. Back then, she could still confide in Fred and laugh and joke with George. Back then, she didn't know the extent of her feelings for Fred. Back then, she was still classified as 'theirs' even though they had no official claim on her. Back then, things weren't so complicated and so…so painful.

Lily was still reminiscing when she was greeted by a small, female house-elf.

"Hello Miss." the elf asked shyly, yet happily, "What can November get for you Miss?"

"Hey November." Lily half-heartedly greeted the elf, "Do you have any Dragonspirits?"

November the elf reluctantly nodded and slumped off to get the requested beverage. She came back with a glass bottle with a cork for a lid and held it out.

"Thanks." Lily took the bottle and wandered around outside the grounds.

She took small sips at first, mustering up the courage to talk to Fred. She didn't think she could do it without breaking down. She didn't want to cry in front of him, but she didn't exactly want to slap him either. Did she?

Maybe she did want to slap him. One day he's ready and willing to fight for her and the next…the next he couldn't care less? She was extremely confused. Fred only added to the confusion by getting into that fight with Mason. If he didn't care about her, why was he so worked up?

Lily shook her head, as if to shake the thoughts away and took a swig of the brownish red liquid. It burned her throat and tasted like shit but she really didn't care. It was strong; a lot stronger than Firewhiskey or Butterbeer. November had only given her about half a bottle and the affects were quickly starting to take place.

Lily's vision was slightly blurred and her steps were wonky. Her hearing was fuzzy, and her stomach was lurching. Her head was swimming as she squinted. Her vision cleared up enough to see where she was. She was standing outside the Gryffindor common room.

She took a deep breath and straightened up, nearly toppling over in the process. She walked up to the portrait of The Fat Lady and said the Gryffindor password. Or at least, she thought she did. She stood, expecting the portrait to open.

"Hello?" she said waving her free hand in front of The Fat Lady's face, "aren't you going to let me in?"

"You need the password." the portrait replied in her sing-song voice.

"I just said the password!" Lily said through slurred speech.

"My dear, you said nothing." the portrait replied sweetly.

"Oh," Lily cleared her throat, "_bootur scosh_." Even if she didn't have alcohol on her breath, Lily's speech was so bad even The Fat Lady couldn't understand what she was saying.

"Please repeat that?" the portrait frowned. Lily sighed in annoyance.

"_Butter scotch_." she said clearer and the portrait swung open. She stepped into the common room and people stared at her. She ignored them all and walked to the door of the twins' dorm. She opened the door and saw Tina in there with the boys. "What are you doing here?" Lily asked cocking a curious eyebrow.

"No reason," she said hurriedly, "just leaving." she finished and slipped out of the door. Lily shrugged it off, too drunk to note it as suspicious. Lily walked over to one of the twins and looked at him sternly.

"Fred, we need to talk." she said pointing at him with the hand that still clutched the near empty bottle of Dragonspirits.

"Then you should probably talk to him." George pointed at the other twin.

"Oh." Lily said again and walked over to Fred. "Fred, we need to talk."

"I'll leave you to it." George said leaving the room and closing the door behind him.

"Lily, you're drunk," Fred said level-headedly.

"Pffshh," she said waving a hand in the air, "I've had a little to drink is all."

"We can talk when you're sober." he said although guilt crashed down on him because he knew he had made her this way.

"That was my original plan." she said brightly.

"Lily," he opened his mouth to protest, but Lily had thrown herself at him – literally. He caught her in mid-air. She wrapped her legs around his torso and snaked her arms around his neck as she leant down to meet his lips.

Fred kissed her back with no hesitation. She shoved her tongue into his mouth and began to unbutton his cardigan. She pushed it off his shoulders with ease, never breaking their kiss. He walked forward a little more and laid her down on his bed. She tugged him down by the collar of his shirt and then pulled it over his head, revealing his toned and muscular chest.

'_Thank you quiddich_.' she thought as she ran a hand over Fred's exposed chest.

She began fumbling with his belt buckle as he slid his hands up her sides. She lifted her hands into the air briefly, allowing Fred to remove her shirt and discard it. He stopped for a moment, taking in the sight of the scars left on her arm. He had a guilty look on her face as if he was the one who had cut her arm. He noticed one scar in particular. It looked quite new and was dangerously close to her wrist. Lily squirmed, uncomfortable with Fred seeing what was left of her self-harm. He looked back at her eyes and kissed her softly on the mouth, as if to say sorry. Lily returned the kiss and it heated up once again.

Her hands instantly moved back to the belt, which was also discarded quickly along with his jeans. He leant down and planted kisses along her stomach and around her bellybutton. His lips made his way back up to the centre of her torso and his hands tightened around her waist. She kissed his neck hard and dug her fingernails into his back, resulting in a moan of pleasure from the boy. She was showering his neck with small kisses when Fred spoke.

"Wait, stop, stop." he said standing up. Lily looked up and met his eyes and he looked…mortified. Okay, not exactly the reaction she expected.

"What? Did I do something wrong?" she asked sitting up.

"No, Merlin, no." he said wiping his face with his hand, "it's me. I shouldn't be taking advantage of you while you're drunk and upset."

"You aren't taking advantage." she said. "I love you and you just proved that you still love me. Why can't we do this?"

"Because…it wouldn't be right." he said, trying to convince himself not to continue removing the clothing from the girl in front of him.

"Why? Why wouldn't it be right?" she argued.

"I don't want you to do something you'll regret." he said softly.

"I won't regret it Fred! It's what I've wanted for so long. _You're _what I've wanted for so long." she said almost pleadingly.

"I don't want you to lose your virginity while you're drunk. You deserve better than that." he said putting a hand comfortingly on Lily's shoulder and resisting the urge to slide it down, taking her bra strap with him.

"Fine," she sighed, "can I at least lay here with you?"

He smiled sadly and nodded. The girl pulled herself under the covers and soon Fred was in there with her. His arm slipped protectively around her waist and her head buried into his chest, taking in his scent.

Fred was fretting the upcoming morning. If Mason found out what had just happened, Merlin knows what he would do. He eventually pushed these thoughts aside to enjoy having his beautiful girl in his arms once again.


	13. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

Lily awoke the next morning with a pounding headache.

"Thank Merlin it's a Sunday." she said wiping her head groggily.

She looked around, trying to adjust to her surroundings. She soon recognized it as her dorm room. She was in her bed, not wearing much of anything, and completely alone. She checked her pocket watch and saw that it was 11:46am.

She rubbed her forehead again, trying desperately to remember what happened last night. She remembered going to the kitchens, wandering around the ground, talking to a portrait and then…

Nothing.

It all went blank. Lily had no idea what had happened after that moment, she didn't even remember which portrait it was.

She got slowly out of bed and stumbled into the bathroom. The shower came on with a loud hiss and sprayed her with warm steam. She walked into it and relished in the feeling of the warm water hitting her cold skin. She grabbed the soap and started slowly running it over her body.

'_Is that -_' she thought, noticing a red mark on her stomach. '_Oh Merlin, it is! Why the fuck do I have a hickey next to my bellybutton?_'

She brushed her fingers against it lightly. Her mind flashed a quick image of her on a bed with someone kissing her stomach. But who?

"Okay, so, I hooked up with someone when I was drunk. That's nothing new." she muttered to herself, stepping out of the hot water and wrapping a towel around her.

She got dressed as she tried to piece together the events from the previous night. It was slowly starting to come back to her. She remembered being in a dorm with someone. She remembered removing clothing from a tall boy and him returning the favour. She also had a strange sensation of suspicion and queasiness eating away at the back of her mind.

She shrugged it off and headed out to the great hall in time for lunch. When she got there, she took a seat beside Tina and Draco. She greeted them and began to mound her plate with food. She was too busy stuffing a ham sandwich into her mouth to notice the pitiful look Draco and Tina were both giving her.

"Hungry Draco?" Lily laughed, watching Draco try and eat a muffin and a nutella sandwich at the same time.

"Always." he said with his mouth full.

"So, you slept in today." Tina teased.

"Yeah, I think I got a bit drunk last night and -" Lily started, but her attention was taken away when a certain pair of red-heads entered. She watched Fred and George as they took their seats at the Gryffindor table. Lily was staring at Fred when she saw something on his neck. It was a big red hickey the size of England.

That's when it hit her like a punch in the face.

She was with _Fred_ last night. He gave her the love bite and she obviously gave him one too. He was the one taking off her clothes. She was in his dorm.

And so was Tina!

"Why the fuck were you in Fred and George's dorm last night?" Lily exclaimed loudly without thinking.

"I-um-I—er-well um… " Tina stumbled.

"Well?" Lily pushed.

"Maybe we should go back to the dorm?" Tina suggested, standing from the table and kissing Draco lightly on the temple before leaving, ushering Lily to follow.

They made their way back to the dorm, where Lily had been just half an hour ago, and sat on Tina's bed. Tina sighed.

"I was in their dorm because I had to talk to Fred." she said.

"About what?" Lily asked.

"About why he broke up with you."

"You already know why. He just doesn't love me anymore." Lily said, although she didn't know if she believed it herself anymore.

"Oh, bullshit! Even you don't believe that. He pounded on Mason because he was kissing you, would he do that if he didn't care? No. So I wanted to find out the real reason."

"Did you?" Lily asked quietly, staring at the floor.

"I did." Tina said sympathetically.

"So, why did he do it?"

"I wish I could tell you, but it's not my place."

"Tina, please. It's not like he's going to tell me himself. You're my best friend; I should hear it from you if not from him."

"Well…"

"Please." Lily pleaded and Tina answered with a sigh.

"Mason is blackmailing him."

"What?" Lily choked out, "How? Why?"

Tina nodded and spoke again. "He threatened to have Mr Weasley fired if Fred didn't leave you and convince you he didn't love you."

"Please, please, _please_ tell me you're joking!"

"I wish I was,"

"Oh my…" Lily was in so much shock that she was gasping for breath. "Everything I did to myself! I thought he didn't love me! I thought he didn't care! Why didn't he tell me?"

"Because he knew that if you knew there was no way you would be with Mason and his dad would be fired anyway. He loves you, but he couldn't let that happen to his family."

"I know, Tina, I understand, I'm just in shock. He should've trusted me. His family has been so, so good to me, I don't want Arthur to lose his job."

"I know sweetie."

Tears began to fall as Lily decided on what she had to do. She couldn't be selfish. Yes, she would always love Fred, but if she needed to be with Mason to make sure his family didn't fall apart, she would. She knew what it was like to lose your family. She couldn't let Fred go through that pain. She knew what she had to do.

She had to let him go.

* * *

**A/N: So guys, it's getting closer to Christmas and I'm already planning to write a Drarry and Wolfstar one-shot for Christmas and New Years (I know it's early, but oh well). I also wanted to write one with Freed in it, but I only ship him with Lily so I thought I'd ask you guys if you wanted a Fred/Lily one-shot for Christmas and New Years? Leave me a review if you'd like it! Also, I'll take requests for a pairing for a Christmas and/or New Years one-shot if you'd like, I write most pairings there's just a few that I don't but if you want one, let me know by leaving me a review or messaging me! xo**


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